Thousand Ways To Kill You - (Why?)

I had loved you more than me,
You, you betrayed the only one who could give his life for you.
I have no words to explain my pain. Its unbearable,
It just kills me each day, looking at you, I feel, I should.

Started the day of your birthday celebration,
When you accepted his gift, You promised me you give it back,
But you never did, you made me a fool, Made me believe that it was not important,
I am a fool, I was, Not any anymore and so I have decided I should.

You want everyone to crowd around you, Make you feel important,
Each day, I said that I did love you, you just wanted others attention,
I wanted to be the only one, I did not deserve that much of respect from you?
You had so many guys around you, You forgot me, that is the reason why, I should.

I always felt that you understood my pain, I never stated it though,
But I was wrong, You never saw it, You thought I just didn't care enough, I did,
I wanted you to be happy, May be, I thought at the cost of my happiness,
You just didn't get the point, each time I made it, you became defensive, That was more than I could take,
So I should.

You had the people who called you every night, You never told me who they were,
What they spoke to you, Why you took so much time to speak to them,
You didn't spend enough time with me, Respect was like hunger, you feed it, you satisfy,
I was lonely, all through out, You didn't see my misery, my crying. Thats why I should.

And you specifically liked the baldy, You went out for random dinners without telling me,
He had now become your friend who heard you all day and night, what about me?
I don't have anyone like that, You tell me he listens to you, make an attempt to speak to me,
But never, You said I should reconsider my priorities, May be now I should.

After we broke up, you told me that I was still your best friend,
I was ill for more than a week, I coughed each day and each night, without sleep,
I was depressed, horrified, lonely, alienated, thinking someone will call,
No one did, Oh I have chosen my motive in life now, May be you should have too.

I have long been thinking, I have trespassed, you have been the motive of my life,
I have just been thinking how can I, how will I, I don't think I should, May be I should,
Losing each strand of patience in my vein, I lie fruitless, My arms ache and my brain is dead,
The reason I live now is to plan,
Plan thousand ways to Kill you.